Prism of Love
Love (or Friendship) can be represented by a pyramid (Prism of Love ® ).
- The 4 vertical edges (the 4 Q’s) represent the 4 fundamental pillars of a relationship. IQ, QE, Sex (Qs) and Physics (Qp). The friendship will be represented by the 4Q integrating intimacy instead of sex. We need a close intellectual level, but also the same emotional « sensitivity » to feel deeply attracted to someone. The physical represents the appearance (our mask) of our personality (a sweet mixture of what we think we are, what we want to be, what we let consciously and unconsciously and that is perceived, and what we are really). Sex represents intimacy and our renunciation to control the other, our capacity to live the present, to express oneself, without judging.
• The base of the pyramid represents the fundamental needs (Maslow’s hierarchy): physical, security, belonging, esteem and accomplishment that define our environment and situation: the right moment!
• The prism is filled with a purple gas (choose your favorite color) which represents the Confidence. Without trust (in us and / or in the other), the pyramid is empty and collapses on itself. Conversely, the swollen pyramid of confidence spreads without limit.
- The pyramid is pulled up by the arrow of our motivations (objectives / fears) and resignations (goals / fears), Itself balanced by our desires (future, beliefs, the Child) and our values ( past, injuries, the Parent). We can share the same crystal but if our motivations (to found a family, want a child, ..) are different, the relationship will be difficult. This arrow enlarges our prism of love or on the contrary represses it.
Prisme de l’Amour ®
If I share the same prism with another person then perhaps, are we made for each other. Regardless of the size of the prism, the essential is the interlocking of your respective prisms.
The pyramid can turn into tepee (Indian tent) with just 3 edges, but unfortunately (thankfully) the prism collapses if we share only 2 edges. One can live happily without sex, or without appreciating the appearance of the other, but front of the storms of life, a pyramid will always be more resilient than a tepee.
The prism of love ® is alive, as you well understood. What is true one day, can change the next day. Depending on the environment, the situation, the prism can decrease, until disappear or on the contrary amplify each day and beautify.
It depends on us, on me, on you. The prism of love ® is fragile and we need to care of it on a regularly basis. To know how to appreciate what we have, to understand and to relativize our illusions, desires and prejudices.
There are no bad people or bad behavior, but inappropriate behaviors for a situation or an objective. That I can modify … or not!
We are therefore actors of our own life and we can act. There is no fatality. Of course, in a relationship, we have to be 2 of us. We can not act for the other. Each one shares 50 / 50. But let’s never forget that we attract what we are. There is no question of chance.
So let’s start by learning to love yourself, in order to attract good people.
Tools such as the Enneagram, transactional analysis, dynamic spiral or simply the 5 wounds can help us better understand each other and therefore understand others to discover, enjoy and share Love, or Friendship.
I am sure (as a good type 3) that these pages help us.