Enneagram Type 9
Enneagram Type 9 (Enneatype 9) – The Mediator
Popularized in the 1970s in the mainstream of humanist psychology, the enneagram is a method of personal development and management.
The Enneagram describes nine different ways of approaching the world, and consequently nine very different ways of interacting with it. Ennea means 9 in Greek. Each of the 9 Enneatypes has its strengths, its weaknesses. Each of us privileges certain information and leaves others aside, in an unconscious way, limiting ourselves to one version of reality. This personal development tool allows you to get to know yourself better and to free yourself from certain sometimes limiting automatisms, and thus improve your interpersonal relationships and well-being.
The enneagram fits well with approaches in modern psychology. Like mindfulness, it emphasizes the importance of arousal over the “autopilot” of daily routines. Like cognitive and behavioral approaches, it relies on beliefs and the identification of inappropriate patterns. Its cognitive and emotional structure can be a useful and powerful guide.
Each individual has the nine profiles of the Enneagram within him, but does not develop them all in the same way. What makes each person unique.
See below the description of type 9 of the enneagram
What I feel. How i see myself
I easily understand everyone’s views and can forget or erase my desires and feelings for them. So I like consensus building, listening and I’m calm and easy going. People sometimes tell me that just being in touch with me makes them feel soothing. I look for harmony but sometimes I lose my priorities because I find myself doing side tasks or getting dizzy in front of the television, the routine. Moreover I avoid conflicts by acting according to the wishes of others, even if it means forgetting myself. I don’t like to choose, or I take my time to make sure I make the right choice.
In fact I find it hard to say no and take a stand because here too I am afraid of conflict. I like to live at my own pace and take the time to live. I am very sensitive to atmospheres. When I walk into a room I capture the prevailing atmosphere and the quality of the relationship between people. I am often in doubt because it is less dangerous for me to think about a decision than to make a choice. So I listen to the opinions of the people concerned. However, I don’t like being pressured or feeling your impatience … When I have made up my mind I don’t change anymore. I can be very stubborn.
- harmony, comfort
- a certain routine
- stable schedules
- the compromises
- listen to you
- take the time to live
I don't like
- have to take a stand
- have to fight
- say no
- to make choices
- feel your impatience
How others perceive me
Most of the Nine are fairly easy going, adopting a “flow with the course of life” strategy. They are generally reliable, hardy, modest, tolerant and sympathetic individuals.
The Nine tend to take an optimistic approach to life. So they are, for the most part, confident people who see the best in others. They often have a deep faith that things are going to be okay. They aspire to feel connected, both to others and to the world as a whole. Nines feel most at home in contact with others and are generally warm and attentive parents.
In general, the Nine are good natured, kind, devoted, forgiving, generous and with whom we feel good. They are seen as people with a heart, leading their interpersonal relationships with others in a friendly, cheerful manner.
The other side of the coin
In fact, Enneagram Type 9 tends not to take enough credit for himself in general. Thus his tendency to withdraw modestly often seems to encourage others to take his approval for granted or to neglect his significant contributions. This can cause a subterranean anger deep within the Nine, which can suddenly erupt and quickly evaporate. But most often this anger manifests itself in the fact of dragging his feet, procrastinating, adopting passive-aggressive behaviors. It can take a long time to him to pretend to search and never find anything.
Being neglected is often a source of deep sadness among the Nine, a sadness they hardly give a voice to.
Type 9 suffers from a deep wound. He depreciates himself enormously. Yet he seems serene, calm, even lymphatic, but he is confused and worried about making conflicting choices.
The Enneagram Type 9 Profile
I am calm and easy going
“the world ignores me and does not listen to my opinion”
“If I get angry with the others they will exclude me”
I have developed a habit of ignoring my basic needs. When I become aware of it from time to time, it generates an inner frustration where I position myself as a victim
Preserve calm and peace, be sensitive to what others want and thus please.
- The risk of wanting to please everyone is to please no one.
- Forgetting yourself to find comfort produces discomfort
Tolerance expressed, listening, welcoming, adaptability, support, calm, team spirit, stubbornness
For that: I narcotize (defense mechanism). I immerse myself in activities to forget the problems. And then I anesthetize the situation and put the priorities to sleep.
The laziness of recognizing my needs and expressing them assertively
to be perceived as self-effacing, lymphatic, passive aggressive, stubborn, fatalistic
- I do what there is to do when it needs to be done and because it’s right to do it
- I learn to know myself: my needs, my strengths and weaknesses, my frustrations
- And then I am learning to express them assertively, and I am worthy of love
- I like myself as I like others
Projections and wings
When the Enneagram type Nine 9 is under stress, he projects to his region of disintegration. He then looks like type 6 by his worried, panicked and doubtful side.
In the phase of security and tranquility, type 9 of the enneagram projects himself into his integration zone and behaves like a type 3 fulfilled by taking control and awakening his strength and dynamism (Action).
- With a pronounced wing 8: the Referee
- With a pronounced wing 1: the Contemplator.
Confusions and similarities with other types
Enneagram type 9 rarely finds his type. Rather, they have a diffuse feeling about their own identity. This situation is aggravated by the fact that the 9 merge with their relatives and by a process of identification, take the characteristics of these.
Women 9 are often typed as 2, especially if they are mothers of small children. The 9’s, however, are modest while the 2’s are quite aware of their own worth.
They also sometimes think they are 4, but 9s tend to avoid negative emotions, while 4s tend to exacerbate them.
Intellectual 9s are often typed as 5, but 5s are intellectually conflicting while 9s seek conciliation and avoidance of conflict.
Description of each of the other Enneatypes